Description: I love her, but Mary Jane Mayhem never fails to disappoint me. I’m so over it! Last night, she promised we would cuddle, and I had grand plans to serve breakfast in bed and share a really romantic morning with her. But her slacking ass fell asleep on the couch yet again, so I prepped breakfast for one, which was bagels and lox! To punish my lacking lady, I wake her with my rank lox and morning breath. There’s nothing worse than the amalgamation of morning and lox breath! I made her smell it all, as I breathed into her nose and did not let up until she said she was sorry. Let’s see if this harsh punishment teaches this lazy lounger a lesson!